Friday, August 20, 2010

The last confusing birthday

Yesterday my Crazy Toddler (CT) "celebrated" his last confusing birthday.

I say that because while he probably didn't have any clue why we were trying to do fun things with him, it didn't stop his mother and I from treating Aug. 19 like a very special day.

Truth be told, I could have thrown a rag onto the floor and he would have been happy. Still, we did our best:
—— We gave him presents from his grandmother and aunt. I'm sure he has no idea why he was handed cool gifts including a kiddie drill set and a Buzz Lightyear backpack this afternoon, but he definitely enjoyed them. I liken it to opening up a workplace fridge and finding a 12 pack of Dr. Pepper — and not knowing how it got there.

Guzzle first, ask questions later.

—— CT posed for photos at Portrait Innovations. He was wearing his seersucker suit, so he had that extra swagger that can't necessarily be mustered by the henley onesie/pleated jeans ensemble. He was really working it with his jostled-hair look, big blue eyes and muscle-man poses (I made that last one up.).

—— We sang "Happy Birthday" several times at different junctures; I can only imagine what he must have been thinking: "Don't they know any other songs? What about some of Bowie's earlier work? This happy-go-lucky stuff was all right when I was 1, but I'm 2 now. Expand the songbook already."

—— We enjoyed dinner at Sonic. His watermelon slushie was supposed to be a special treat, but it proved to be nothing more than a strange-tasting impediment to what seemingly is his first love: Running into the street or busy parking lots without a care in the world.

I guess that's what you get when you eat outdoors. A padded cell may have been a better choice.

—— We went to the park. At this point I'm too old to remember thinking of the park as a fun treat, but CT likes it more than Keith Olbermann relishes being the lowest common denominator.

After about an hour of swinging; trying to climb up dangerous steps; and inching down every slide in his unique, scared way, we called it a day.

Actually, we called it a birthday — but something tells me he wasn't savvy.

2 comments:

  1. I think you're on to something here, Jake. I say next year (and every year after that), go out of your way to make the birthday confusing. Obviously, this year, a "normal" celebration was, naturally, confusing. But next year, throw a kink into it. Maybe dress him up in his Sunday's best, and then stand on a corner, blow bubbles into the street, and wave at the traffic. The year after, stay in PJ's all day, and watch the first 6 minutes of every Law & Order SVU episode ever made. The only common thread throughout the birthdays can be that on each birthday, you finish it off with a dinner of hot dogs served with honey.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Laughed out loud with this one because it's SO true. Toddlers don't really "get it" when it comes to birthdays. Although I was surprised at my niece on her 2nd birthday. We kept telling her it was her birthday and eventually she picked it up and declared to her older brother, when he attempted to play with one of her new toys, "My birthday!" As if it were the final word on all accounts, "Don't touch my stuff dude, it's my birthday."
    cristina

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for sharing.